Outrage Over Children’s Book Parody Will Simply Feed Culture War Further

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," October 9, 2018. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: All right. Hello, everyone. I'm Dana Perino along with Kennedy, Juan Williams, Jesse Watters, and Greg Gutfeld.  He's on the phone. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is "The Five."

There is one thing we know for sure, the battle over Brett Kavanaugh has thrown a wrench into the upcoming midterm races. Today was not only Justice Kavanaugh's first official day on the Supreme Court. You can see him there in the little picture. It also marks four weeks to Election Day.  Last night, President Trump apologized to him for the hostel campaign waged against him.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: I want to apologize to Brett and the entire Kavanaugh family for the terrible pain and suffering you have been forced to endure. Those who stepped forward to serve our country deserve a fair and dignified evaluation, not a campaign of political and personal destruction based on lies and deception. What happened to the Kavanaugh family violates every notion of fairness, decency, and due process.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: But, the president's critics are now slamming his comments, saying it was a battle cry for the upcoming election.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

HILLARY CLINTON, FORMER DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE: What was done last night in the White House was a political rally. It further undermined the image and integrity of the court. And that troubles me greatly.

UNINDENTIFIED MALE: He uses a foe swearing in of a Supreme Court justice who has been sworn in prior to last evening as a platform to go after the white male vote.

UNINDENTIFIED MALE: Usually, the president is healing in that moment, and apologizing to Kavanaugh on behalf of the nation it just -- it felt, again, like -- sort of a Trump-orchestrated political event.

UNINDENTIFIED MALE: This is what power looks like. This is what power looks like. Republicans have the power to do this, and they did it.  They've timed it so that more people would be watching, more people would be home and paying attention to it. And it was, you know, in part a campaign ad by the president.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: And with just a month to go before Americans vote, a new poll showing a staggering 58 percent of independents disapprove of the way Democrats handled the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh. And then moments ago, President Trump addressed Kavanaugh's impact on a GOP strategy heading into the midterms.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: How do you keep your base energized now that you have Kavanaugh (INAUDIBLE). I would say that just by winning.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: OK. So, Kavanaugh, day 78 or something like that, but it's still a winner for the president. And if you look at that poll, Greg, it is seems to be having an impact on the midterms.

GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: Yeah. The weird thing is I did an experiment where I tried to remember the big story before the last big story. Like I knew there was a story before Kavanaugh, like a week prior to that, that was the biggest story and then this was huge. I can't remember it. So.

PERINO: Hurricane?

GUTFELD: It was hurricane. So 30 days or less than 30 days -- under 30 days is -- in Trump world is in fact a year of stories. So every day there's going to be something else. And I'm sure they'll be something -- what's today? Tuesday.  By Thursday, that would be huge. And.

JESSE WATTERS, CO-HOST: Kanye's Thursday.

GUTFELD: Kanye's Thursday, that's right. I think the Trump apology was necessary and deserved. I think what happened to Kavanaugh should never happen to an American citizen. It was disgraceful. America deserves an apology for it as well. But Trump shouldn't be the only person apologizing. Feinstein should apologize. Schumer should apologize. The media, Avenatti, they all should apologize because they knew what they were doing. They knew that they could ruin a family for a political motive, for political power. It's probably one of the worst things I've ever seen.  And believe me, I've seen a lot of bad things.

PERINO: Yeah, things on things. Did you think -- what are you hearing, Jesse, about midterms and -- we're less than 30 days out.

WATTERS: Well, I feel like the Republican base is very activated, and it's because of the Kavanaugh confirmation. And this whole thing which has happened yesterday night was a real microcosm of the Trump presidency, because here he is, he's just nominated his second justice and has him confirmed. And he's exposed the left as kind of Me Too maniacs and he's energized his base. And all the left can do is talk about the words he used in the optics of the event. Meanwhile, he's put in 41 district court judges, 26 court of appeals judges, and this is his second justice.

What the left needs to do is take inventory about what happened in this fight, pivot to another topic because this is not working. Stop talking about impeachment. Stop talking about the Electoral College and just move forward. Instead, they're acting like he's the first politician to do something political at the White House. I mean, I'm shocked. Barack Obama never did anything political. He was a statesman. Oh, wait a second, I've just googled it. Barack Obama had the exact same ceremony for Sotomayor, a day or two after she was sworn in at the White House where he invited the congressional Hispanic caucus, the leaders of the senate judiciary committee, and they talked about single mothers, and they talked about diversity, and immigration. You know, those kinds of things that made up the Obama political coalition. So, when Barack Obama does something, it's never political, but when Donald Trump does something it's nakedly partisan.

JUAN WILLIAMS, CO-HOST: Well, let me just say, Dean Martin.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: I mean, it's really hip.

WATTERS: Thank you, Juan.

GUTFELD: He needs a tumbler of whiskey.

WILLIAMS: Do you think I would do it for you?

PERINO: Another one?

WATTERS: You don't know what's in here. What's in Kennedy?

(LAUGHTER)

(CROSSTALK)

WILLIAMS: Anyway, you know, it's so obvious. What a different tone for Sotomayor's swearing-in versus last night. Last night was really, you know, revenge of the Republicans. Republicans in the end zone doing a dance, right?

GUTFELD: Yeah. It was an apology.

WILLIAMS: So, to me -- and the apology out of line, totally. Remember, that poll that we've showed a moment ago, oh, gosh, we didn't show you, but guess what, most Americans disapproved of the way Republicans handled this as well.

PERINO: More so the Democrats.

WILLIAMS: No, I think it's about the same. And the bottomline is 51 percent of Americans did not approve of this man's confirmation. In addition.

(CROSSTALK)

WILLIAMS: . a majority of Americans believed Professor Ford, not Justice Kavanaugh. So this is going to go on for some time. And if you want to get into women, Dana, wow, American women are overwhelming in their disapproval of Kavanaugh. So when you hear people say, oh, my gosh, what we see here is President Trump basically having a campaign ad at the White House and throwing it in people's faces. That's what it felt like.

GUTFELD: He was apologizing to a family whose lives were ruined.

WILLIAMS: Why didn't he apologize to Ms. Ford?

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: If anything, I owed an apology because I have to sit next to Juan.

WILLIAMS: Yeah.

WATTERS: Who has just been really rough.

PERINO: You know who needs an apology, Kennedy, who hasn't gotten a word in.

KENNEDY, GUEST CO-HOST: Well, I'm just watching the fireworks with a basket of popcorn here. I don't know why it's in a basket, not a bucket.  This is what I will say, we are in a very politically strange time because both people can be right. You can have independents who are outraged by the way Democrats behave because all of this could have been going on before or during the confirmation process, especially early on. And most of this could be absolutely avoided, including the embarrassment not only of the Kavanaugh family but also of the Ford family. But it was Democrats who are being so hyper political and that's why they're taking such a big hit with independents.

But, also, Judge Kavanaugh, you're right. He isn't polling very well with women right now, but it doesn't matter because he's not running for office, is he? No, he's got a lifetime appointment. He never has to interview for a job ever again. So that is pretty much settled. So now what Democrats are doing is they essentially just making stuff up and acting like they're outraged that a politician would have a political moment. And if you look at this in contrast with some of the rallies that the president has, like those are hyper political moment, that's when he goes out and really fires up the base.

I think what you're seeing here is a lot of people who were supporting Justice Kavanaugh felt like he was going to be blocked from confirmation, and the fact that they actually got a win, and it was fact victorious over feelings, that was the boisterousness in that crowd. You saw a lot of people especially on social media shocked and surprised and relieved and that's why they were celebrating.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: You know who we need to hear from right now, Juan, if you don't mind, you know, James Carville who said if the economy stupid, well, in 2018, apparently, it could be Kavanaugh as the big issue. Here's what he has to say.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JAMES CARVILLE, DEMOCRATIC STRATEGIST: Kavanaugh is going to be an issue in 2018. He's going to be an issue in 2020. The Democrats are going to keep digging up stuff. The press is not going to stop all of the things that they're working on about Kavanaugh.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: The press is not going to stop, Greg.

GUTFELD: I love -- he gets dressed for Halloween so early. You know, I have advice for Democrats and they may not listen to me, but they're trying to create a battle in which all men are the oppressors and all women are the victims. This is part of the leftist identity politics strategy, women as victim, men as oppressors. The problem with this is that women live with men. They love men and vice versa. And the bigger problem with this gambit is that there are black men and Hispanic men in the Democratic Party who are as concerned about false allegations as everybody else in this world. So you may sit there -- it's going to be about oppressors versus victims, but there're people that are sensibly saying, like, well, wait a minute, what about due process? And it's going to be men in the Democratic Party who are actually going to start thinking about that.

KENNEDY: Also, men who vote.

GUTFELD: Right.

KENNEDY: And, you know, when you have people like Senator Hirono from Hawaii saying things like men need to step up and shut up, that's really off-putting. Elizabeth Warren, her comments sort of reflect the same thing. And I think Hillary Clinton and some of the more progressive women in the Democratic Party, and she puts herself in that camp, although she may not be there honestly. They really want to exacerbate this gender civil war. And it's one of the worst things that can happen. And it's very, in its own way, paternalistic and belittling.

WATTERS: And let's remember, James Carville was the one that said about one of Bill Clinton's accusers, if that's what happens when you drag a dollar bill through a trailer park. So he's not clean on this whole Me Too issue. They have a whole war room run by James Carville to go after women who accuse Bill Clinton of doing things. So it scares me that he already seems like he knows the media is continuing to dig in on Kavanaugh.

WILLIAMS: Well, here's the reason why.

PERINO: Last word, Juan.

WILLIAMS: So you have the president last night saying that Kavanaugh has been proven innocent. Again, this is like sticking your finger in the eyes of someone who's down. You know, this is like what happened Saturday night in Vegas where the guy is jumping over the ring and starting a fight in the crowd. You think the fight's over. You guys won.

GUTFELD: You just said the fight is not over.

WILLIAMS: The fight in the political terms, Greg, is not over because, guess what, you guys talk about independents. Independents disagree with the Republicans handled this, 53 -- it's not even close. So they didn't like Democrats handling it. They don't like -- but they do believe Professor Ford. And the key here is that when it comes to, you know, Kavanaugh talking about, oh, buffing, and devils triangle.

(CROSSTALK)

WILLIAMS: . I didn't have many drinks, you know, I just had a beer. People don't believe that. They know this guy was trying to cover. And so, you know what.

KENNEDY: Can I ask you something?

WILLIAMS: . the politics is just outrageous.

KENNEDY: Do Democrats believe in redemption?

WILLIAMS: Of course. Why not? I'm a Christian.

KENNEDY: It just doesn't seem like there was any grace extended to Brett Kavanaugh throughout this entire process.

WILLIAMS: Oh, I disagree. And, in fact, that one of the arguments that Republicans made is, oh, gees, it was the mob. Oh, gee whiz, how unfair, no due process. This wasn't a trial. This was about a man's character and whether he was telling the truth.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Yeah, let's do it at every job interview.

WILLIAMS: Yeah.

GUTFELD: Every job interview.

WILLIAMS: In that case, he failed.

WATTERS: Juan, he's got a robe on right now.

WILLIAMS: No.

PERINO: Yes.

WILLIAMS: In other words, you can run over people.

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: He's going to be there his whole life, Juan.

WILLIAMS: You can run over people but, guess what, people is going to remember.

WATTERS: It's not called running over when you have the majority.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: Hillary Clinton calling for incivility against Republicans, can you believe that? Ahead on "The Five."

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WILLIAMS: Another surprising announcement coming out of the Trump administration, U.N. Ambassador Nikki Haley abruptly resigning today.  Haley's expected to exit at the end of the year. She addressed her decision to leave earlier at the White House.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

NIKKI HALEY, U.S. AMBASSADOR TO THE U.N.: I think that the main thing was I was governor for six years and we dealt with a hurricane, a thousand year flood, a church shooting, a school shooting, it was a lot. And then to come and do two years of Russia and Iran and North Korea, it's been eight years of intense time and I'm a believer in term limits. And I will say this for all of you that are going to ask about 2020, no, I'm not running for 2020. I can promise you what I will be doing is campaigning for this one. So, I look forward to supporting the president in the next election.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WILLIAMS: This afternoon, the president answered questions about one potential replacement for Haley who's been -- or she's being floated in the press. Take a look.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: I think Ivanka would be incredible that -- doesn't mean -- you know, I'd pick her because you'd be accused of nepotism even though I'm not sure there's anybody more competent in the world, but that's OK. But we are looking at numerous people.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WILLIAMS: So, Jesse, Nikki Haley is the most popular cabinet member in the Trump administration. And I think today everybody is asking why now?

WATTERS: You mean more popular than Jeff Sessions? How is that possible?

WILLIAMS: You better check with the president on that one. Check with your buddy.

WATTERS: I mean, she was not fired by tweet like Rex. She was not escorted off of the motorcade like Reince. And she was not escorted with secret service out of the White House like Amoroso. So, she left with her reputation intact. I'm not going to play speculation nation like the rest what the press is doing, you know. She's either going to run for president against Donald Trump, she was the anonymous op-ed writer. She's going to take Lindsey Graham's seat when Graham goes to justice. So, I don't really know. What I do know she's got two young children, and she needs money, and she's been working really, really hard, and I think she'll probably land a very nice contributor ship somewhere possibly, rack up some big speaking fees, may be write a book, become a lobbyist and make a lot of coin, and that's good for her.

Right now, there's like -- I think Dina Powell, her name has been floating around. And, as you know, Ric Grenell, his name has been floated around.  But, as U.N. ambassador, she did a much better job than Susan Rice. She didn't lie on all five Sunday shows which is really good. She rallied the U.N. Security Council against North Korea. She spoke very strongly about Iran and Syria. So she had a really good run. I don't know what's going to happen now, but she, you know, was the victim of a lot of fake news too.  Remember the curtains and the really disgusting rumors from Fire and Fury.  And she handled it with a lot of class. So I think whatever she does, you know, tomorrow, she's going to have a great road ahead of her.

WILLIAMS: So, Kennedy, a lot of this is about, as you heard from Jesse, well, is it possible that this inquiry into her use of private jets is the prompting because -- everybody is surprised. John Bolton says he's surprised. Mike Pompeo says he's surprised. So, why now? Jesse says, well, you know, it's a nice time to go, there's no problems, but what do you think?

KENNEDY: Well, after the curtain scandal, David Hoag called for her resignation. So clearly, he has more power than we ever thought imaginable. That's the thing, we don't really know what to think at this point. There's so many unanswered questions. I will say that of all the cabinet members, she is a moderate yet competent voice. She's very interesting. She has comported herself quite well. She has aligned herself with the president when she thought it was appropriate and she's distance herself when there were areas of disagreement. And I think she's actually created a pretty good template for other people who will follow in her footsteps, not just in this job but in others, how to effectively and honestly deal with the president. I think his cabinet has been better for her presence there and you never know what the timing is. And I think it's cruel and a little early to speculate on some of the more ominous things that have been floated around.

WILLIAMS: About her.

KENNEDY: Yes.

WILLIAMS: So, Dana, you know a lot of these players. But, particularly, know Dina Powell who's been considered.

PERINO: and Ric Grenell.

WILLIAMS: And Ric.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: It's interesting is like one of those things where people who had experience in the previous administration, they end up often working for the next administration is they aligned party wise. A lot of people from the Clinton world ended up working for President Obama, though not as many as you would think. Dina Powell has experience working for President Trump as the national security advisor. So like Nikki Haley, gained a lot of foreign policy experience in that time. And then, Ric Grenell just got confirmed by the senate. That was a tough confirmation. And President Trump apparently loves what he's doing in Germany and really having an impact there. So, I think that for her, she was able to leave on -- Nikki Haley, able to leave on her own terms. A lot of people don't know when to leave. We've talked about that before, right?

GUTFELD: Like Jesse.

(LAUGHTER)

PERINO: Like you stay too long. And I think two years is a very natural time to leave.

WILLIAMS: So before I.

PERINO: I think the only curious thing is why they announced it today.  Like why not wait until after the midterms.

KENNEDY: That was my question too.

PERINO: I think that because the president has held it as a secret for 5, 6 days. He got Kavanaugh's ceremoniously sworn in last night and he was ready to turn the page. He's moving at an accelerated pace. They have a lot of things on the table right now. She won't be the only person to leave at the end of two years. And remember, it is said that she told the president six months ago she wanted to leave. She had -- the thing is, if your boss really likes you and you like them but you know you're going to have to go, you start having these conversations early. You plant the seed so that it won't become abrupt and a problem later on.

(CROSSTALK)

WILLIAMS: That's kind of sketchy because I think in this administration it would have been leaked. No leaks. And I mean, you know, the top people in the administration said they didn't know. That's kind of weird to me.  But, Greg, I just want to come to Ivanka.

GUTFELD: Ivanka.

WILLIAMS: The first daughter.

GUTFELD: No, no, no, no, you guys -- a coincidence or not a coincidence that Donald Trump is meeting with Kanye West later. So we all.

WATTERS: Ambassador.

GUTFELD: Ambassador Kanye West. It makes total sense to me. Talk about leaving on top, though. If you think about everything that's been going on in the world since Nikki Haley has been around, with the exception of Syria, which is still a problem. You've got -- the North Korea thing is huge. And trade and terror, we're entering this new world with China.  This is like the most consequential two years I've seen in recent history of things that are actually going on and taking place. Why she's leaving, I think you're close. It had to do with private jets. But the story I heard from the New York Times is that she threw an ice cube at Mike Pompeo on Air Force One. And it's a pattern of abuse.

WATTERS: Of patterns.

GUTFELD: . of using frozen water as a dangerous projectile.

(LAUGHTER)

WILLIAMS: Wow. Well, we'll take that.

PERINO: Breaking ice cube news, you could bring that.

GUTFELD: Exactly.

WILLIAMS: Thank you, Greg. And people -- protesters taking over the streets in Portland. Greg takes on the, quote, angry mob. That's next on "The Five."

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: What do you get when you cross a bunch of angry losers with a cowardly mayor? How about a violent mob harassing innocent people?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

(SHOUTING)

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Isn't that pleasant? According to NRO and Quillette writer, Andy Ngo, Portland's lawless mob is as routine in that city as lawless mobs are in the Senate office building. This video from October 6 shows Antifa assuming the role of armed crossing guard threatening citizens with physical harm, even chasing them down with weapons. My favorite part: A pasty white loser attacking a law-abiding driver for being white.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Just go that way.

UNIDENTIFIED DRIVER: Why?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Because I told you to.

UNIDENTIFIED DRIVER: Really?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Don't hurt anybody, just go --

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yeah, brother. Get out of here you little white little (BLEEP).

UNIDENTIFIED DRIVER: Really?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yeah. You're (BLEEP) whitey, aren't you?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: How is that not a hate crime? And how is this possible? Well, when Portland's mayor, Ted Wheeler, figured it might make him unpopular to enforce the laws, anything is possible. And you know the police aren't there because they feel they'd be punished for doing their job, afraid that they might look to oppressive against the violent mob, Portland leaders simply hand over its authority to govern its citizen to a violent mob. You know what? I better not use the word mob.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

MATT LEWIS, THE DAILY BEAST: When you see people like Ted Cruz getting chased out of restaurants by a mob.

BROOKE BALDWIN, CNN: Oh, you're not going to use the mob word here.

LEWIS: It's totally a mob. It is without a doubt. There's no other word for it.

BALDWIN: A mob? Stop, stop.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Oh, my goodness. So how dare you call a mob a mob? Now the word mob is no longer allowed to be used when looking at a mob. You better apologize because as we're learning, mob rules, especially in Portland. The mob shows up and takes over without a fight. What a great lesson for other creeps who live near places where leaders refused to do their job.  But, hey, if Republicans are evil, anything is permitted. Right, Hillary?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

HILLARY CLINTON, DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE: You cannot be civil with a political party that wants to destroy what you stand for, what you care about.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Fact is, in a world where your silence is demanded, and leaders are safely hidden from the rage that they enable, how do we know who's really in charge? Just look for the mob. Then move to Texas.

I've got to go to you first, Kennedy, because you were born and raised in Portland.

KENNEDY: I was raised there.

GUTFELD: Yes, you weren't born there.

KENNEDY: No.

GUTFELD: No.

KENNEDY: I was born in the mean streets of Indianapolis.

GUTFELD: Wow.

KENNEDY: Literally on the street. My mom --

GUTFELD: How can that -- how can those people not be charged for hate crimes?

KENNEDY: No, it's awful, because the police are not allowed to engage --

GUTFELD: Yes.

KENNEDY: -- with people like that, because --

PERINO: Because the mayor says so?

KENNEDY: Because Ted Wheeler is horrible to law enforcement in -- in and around the city. And it's unfortunate, because, you know, they have tried to do what they can in order to help with the homeless problem, which is really, unfortunately, out of control; and it is affecting quality of life there, and crime has gone up. It is -- it used to be called the most livable city in the world.

GUTFELD: Yes, it's beautiful.

KENNEDY: And it was a destination place for people from expensive parts of the country to move to, because there is affordable housing. It's incredibly beautiful. It is arguably one of the most beautiful cities in the country.

And Ted Wheeler is incredibly unpopular, and it's because of decisions like this. But then he talks out both sides of his mouth. And he would go to a meeting with civic leaders, and someone will say, "Hey, you know, there are bunch of homeless people in Old Town, and they look like zombies. And, you know, the police tell us that you've tied their hands and they can't do anything about it."

He's like, "If a cop tells you that, I want their badge." So he tries to sound, like a tough McGillicutty when it's politically convenient to him, but he's really run a beautiful, incredible city into the ground, and it is unforgivable.

GUTFELD: That's what happens. Juan, OK, here's my worry. If the police and government abdicate the responsibility and also the left believes that you can't protect yourself, isn't this possibly the best commercial you could ever have for the NRA?

WILLIAMS: The NRA? Well --

GUTFELD: Yes, the gun lobby. This is what -- if the police aren't going to be there, who are armed, to protect you, all you can do is protect yourself. I would -- if I were the NRA, I would run that every day.

WILLIAMS: I see. So in other words, it's not enough that you're in a car and you could run them over. You want to shoot them.

GUTFELD: No, no, I'm saying that you have to protect. The police are there -- the police are there to protect you.

WILLIAMS: Well, I'm saying --

GUTFELD: If they're not there, you have to defend yourself.

WILLIAMS: Look -- look, I think this is way overstated. But, you know, to me this is like culture wars on the part of Republicans. "Let's go after these homeless --"

GUTFELD: This never happened?

WILLIAMS: These homeless people --

GUTFELD: Those aren't homeless people.

WILLIAMS: A lot of them are homeless people. I think Kennedy is right. A lot of these people -- by the way --

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: -- a leather satchel.

GUTFELD: -- cell phones.

WILLIAMS: Going through this with you before, I think some -- this was when there was some protest in D.C., and you said look at these Antifa. I mean, a lot of these people are troubled people, and then they join in with an anti-Trump movement, and then you say, "Oh, that's the opposition.  That's why we -- that's a mob." This is no mob. Look, there's a freedom to --

GUTFELD: That's not a mob?

WILLIAMS: Look, those people were misbehaving, and they should -- and they should be held accountable for their actions. So I'm all for it, because I don't like anybody coming after me, my family or you guys on "The Five."  But I'm just saying, this --

KENNEDY: You shouldn't (UNINTELLIGIBLE) in your own city. And it's not acceptable in Berkeley or Chicago or anywhere else.

WILLIAMS: Are you kidding? It's unacceptable in Seattle, New York. I think this problem with people who have mental issues, the homeless, that's growing in our country.

But I think your thing is so curious to me, because, gee, isn't it the Republicans who talk about MS-13, who talk about, "Oh, fake --"

PERINO: We do something about it.

GUTFELD: We do something.

WILLIAMS: Pizza parlors where suddenly conservatives, crazed conservatives come in shooting. You don't talk about that.

GUTFELD: Yes, we do. Jesse.

WATTERS: When does a mob become a mob, Juan? Is it 11? It is 12? When does misbehaving become breaking the law? I mean, come on.  You've got to have some standards. And this place is now a looney bin over there, because the mayor is a nutcase.

Listen, this is what's happening. And Hillary has gone full Maxine Waters.  You don't go full Maxine Waters ever. She went there. And this is why.

It's because, like you said, if you believe your opponents are evil, the ends justify the means. That's why you see the doxing and the hate mail and the threats. All, you know, all this awful, as Juan likes to call it, misbehavior. I think it's a little more dangerous than that.

It's because liberalism needs the state, the power of the state --

KENNEDY: Absolutely right.

WATTERS: -- to enforce their ideology. Democrats are completely shut out of power. They don't have any power in Washington, D.C.. So what they do, instead of using words and their intellect to persuade, they're using mobs to intimidate. Because that's the only way that liberalism can be achieved, through enforcement through state power of their ideas. And that's getting a little dangerous.

GUTFELD: You know what's interesting?

KENNEDY: Imagine if those were conservatives.

GUTFELD: Yes. You can imagine the Tea Party running around --

PERINO: Imagine. Remember the Tea Party? And they're like, "Oh, they're so rude." When they're putting away their signs.

WILLIAMS: I don't have to imagine. They were.

GUTFELD: No, you couldn't find tape of that. I will give you $100 for every piece of tape you find of them running around the streets.

WILLIAMS: Hypocrisy.

KENNEDY: Stateism versus individuals.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: I wondered if may someone can do an experiment. Remember, within the last year or so, you did a couple pieces about the cost of a U-Haul --

WATTERS: Yes.

PERINO: -- a one-way U-Haul from California to Texas. And I just want -- I would be curious to find out what it's like in Portland. People -- it is a beautiful city, but if you can't have law and order, you will not want to live there.

GUTFELD: Yes, and they're also moving the homeless to specific areas of the city that are away from people who are wealthier. So they're hurting new homeowners who are just moving in. And then all of a sudden, they have people -- shooting up.

KENNEDY: And small businesses.

WILLIAMS: Didn't you have us moving out of San Francisco, because they were pooping on the streets.

GUTFELD: Yes.

WILLIAMS: And you have them moving out of New York because of de Blasio.  You have everybody moving out of everywhere.

GUTFELD: It's the poop.

WILLIAMS: Oh, I see.

GUTFELD: Kanye West is heading to the White House. That's next.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

WATTERS: Call it a West Wing meeting. Kanye West -- get it? -- who was back in the headlines last week for wearing a MAGA hat during his "SNL" gig, is set to make another huge appearance, this time at the White House.  The president praising West to reporters and talking about his impact on the African-American community.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: He's been a terrific guy. You know, he loves what we're doing for African-American jobs, for so many different things. Median income, as you see, at an all-time high.  Poverty level at the best rate, meaning the lowest rate so far. And Kanye is a smart guy, and he sees that.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WATTERS: So we're going to go to our Kanye West ombudsman, Greg Gutfeld.  What do you think?

GUTFELD: I know that -- I know what -- I'm going to address Juan's answer -- and thought, because I agree with him that Kanye is only going to see Trump because Trump pays attention to him. And I would say that's how reciprocity works. That's how persuasion works. In sales, that's what you succeed, by actually being nice to somebody, inviting them over.

So this is why Trump, as the real-estate tycoon, is succeeding where other politicians aren't, because he knows the salesmanship.

Kanye is in a unique position. No. 1, he's arguably the biggest male pop star, so he can expend the capital that we don't have. He can take the risks. No. 2, he does take the risks. He serves as an example for individuals who will face the mob. He knows what he's saying is not popular among his peers, but he does it anyway. And last but not least, the guy has, like, four ideas every hour. He's incredibly creative. Let him -- let him try politics.

WATTERS: And what do you think about the idea that there's something that's going to come out of this meeting?

KENNEDY: I like that he has a specific agenda, that there are things that he wants to talk about, and that he doesn't have, you know, these vague platitudes that he wants to spout.

I also appreciate that about his wife, and I've never been a big fan of hers or her family. But the fact that she went in with, you know, a particular list of people --

WATTERS: How dare you?

KENNEDY: -- she wanted to have pardoned, including Alice Johnson, and that actually worked, and we're having a conversation, a legitimate conversation about criminal justice reform, I think it's fantastic.

You wouldn't have expected that out of this administration, certainly not one that named Jeff Sessions as attorney general of the United States. So I'm hopeful about that. I think the whole thing might, in fact, be a giant trolling performance piece. I don't doubt that he has respect for the president and he is inspired by him. Because the president makes people mad every day, but then changes his tone and uses unpredictability in a way that Kanye does.

And Kanye said he challenged himself to wear that red hat on "SNL" to overcome his fears, which I think is very amusing.

WATTERS: Juan.

WILLIAMS: Well, I mean, to me, this is, you know, a photo op. We've been through this before. I just worry that there is no agenda. His agenda, as we know it so far, is, "Oh, Mr. President, you should talk to Colin Kaepernick and stop calling NFL players --"

GUTFELD: That's a good plan.

WILLIAMS: I just think this is the craziest thing ever. This is not just about don't call -- this is about let's do something. So if he really was going to do something, well, then let's come up with a substantive agenda.  But in fact, I think what we see is talk about dragon energy. And I think that right now it's a culture war issue that apparently Republicans can't talk about the tax cuts or the economy. That ain't working. So go after Taylor Swift.

GUTFELD: The economy is not working?

WILLIAMS: Taylor Swift is now the worst.

WATTERS: There is -- there is a substantive agenda. Manufacturing.  Prison reform, gang violence.

PERINO: Yes. But not just manufacturing. Manufacturing jobs specifically in Chicago. That is -- I think that there is quite a -- that's quite a substantive agenda.

WILLIAMS: What's the agenda?

PERINO: He's talking about prison reform in particular, Matthew Charles.  Not Matthew Charles. What was the guy's name that is in prison unfairly?

GUTFELD: Anthony Weiner?

PERINO: No. But prison reform, as Kennedy said.

But also, he talked -- he said he wants to go to ask President Trump his ideas for bringing manufacturing jobs back to Chicago where he grew up.  Like, to me, that's better than just a photo op. That's saying, like, "Here's two things that I really want to get done."

And if he were to convince the president to stop going after NFL players, wouldn't that be a good thing?

GUTFELD: That would be a big deal. It would be a big deal.

WATTERS: That would. And hopefully, the meeting happens at 5 p.m.

A relationship contract taking the Internet by storm. Wait until you hear a list of demands some girlfriend made to her boyfriend. Right back.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

KENNEDY: For the guys out there who think your girlfriend is too controlling, check this one out. A relationship contract going viral after it was found in a recently-bought used car.

Some things the girlfriend demanded from her man: "Mo is NOT going to hang out (with) us every time we hang out. You are NEVER to take longer than 10 minutes to text me back. You are NOT to hang out with Keegan. You are NOT to get mad at me about a single thing ever again. If I catch you around girls, I kill you."

PERINO: Boy, if that was her voice, I would kill her.

KENNEDY: Doesn't it sound like it, though? I mean, these are all pretty unreasonable. What do you think her boyfriend did in order for her to --

PERINO: I am not sure.

KENNEDY: To generate a list like this.

PERINO: Basically, if you have to write a list like this, you shouldn't be with him anyway.

KENNEDY: Yes.

PERINO: And also, he should probably not be with her.

I also have to point out that the "honey do" list that I wrote for Peter that had three things on it this past weekend is, like, easy. So --

KENNEDY: Don't you feel better now?

PERINO: I feel better about our situation.

KENNEDY: So Jesse, I thought this was really interesting, because you know, you hear a lot about victimization in this country; but it turns out women can be controlling, too.

WATTERS: Yes, can you imagine if a man wrote a list like this towards his girlfriend? I mean, that would be like slavery. Because this is what this looks like on the other way.

I do know I want to hang out with Keegan and Mo. That sounds like fun.  And I'm just going to take the rest of this segment off, because I'm afraid to say anything controversial.

PERINO: And also Austin. "Austin does not control when I hang out with you." That would be kind of cool.

WATTERS: That sounds fun.

KENNEDY: And "You are not to bring up Tyler, Noah, Devon, or Josh ever again, Juan."

WILLIAMS: You know what? The part that really got me was she said that, "You know what? I have access to your phone at all times." I'm thinking wow, this is terrible." Everybody can look but, I mean, wow.

So she really thinks that he's with another woman, I guess. Because one of the imperatives here is "never look at another single woman." I don't know how you do that. Because you'd just be walking down the street.

KENNEDY: Well, just peek at the married ones, I guess.

WATTERS: You know, Juan. You know.

WILLIAMS: You know?

WATTERS: Yes, you know.

WILLIAMS: What do you do? Just put blinders on?

WATTERS: You know, Juan. You know.

WILLIAMS: Is that what you have to do?

GUTFELD: I know you know.

WILLIAMS: Do you have to? Is that what you have to do?

KENNEDY: Is that why you always wear sunglasses?

WATTERS: That's right.

GUTFELD: I'll tell you. You know what? Mike Pence looked at this list and said, "I've got this."

It's true. You know this is about? It's about a guy who cheated --

KENNEDY: Yes.

GUTFELD: -- and cheated emotionally on social media. Because this was about a woman looking at the phone and saying, "Who's this? Who's this?  Who's this? Why are you -- why are you leaving comments on this Instagram?  Are you guys friends?" That's what this is about.

There's a new form of cheating going on, and it's social media -- social media emotional cheating. And it drives people crazy.

KENNEDY: Well, it obviously drove a wedge here.

GUTFELD: Yes.

KENNEDY: And so you have to -- you know, if you were going to counsel this young woman, you would look at all these and say, "Is this ever going to work out?" With these high demands.

PERINO: I know, how she says "If we ever move in, there are never to be girls at our house." It's like, don't move in.

GUTFELD: She's probably 15.

(CROSSTALK)

WATTERS: What if Austin wants to bring a girl over? Can Austin bring a girl?

KENNEDY: Austin can but not Keegan. And --

GUTFELD: Definitely not Noah.

PERINO: This one wasn't terrible. She said, "If you say jump, you say, 'How high, princess""? That's not --

WILLIAMS: You know, the fact that we have found this in a car that's been sold --

PERINO: Yes.

WILLIAMS: -- might indicate the state of the relationship.

WATTERS: It is true.

GUTFELD: Check the trunk.

WILLIAMS: Yes, really.

KENNEDY: All right. Well --

PERINO: They'll be on "FOX & Friends" tomorrow.

KENNEDY: Yes, they will, absolutely. They'll be cohosting the show. A fun day. Hey, "One More Thing" is up next. Stay right here.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

PERINO: Time now for "One More Thing." I'm going to go first, because today is the last day of Fat Bear Week. What does that mean? Well, in Katmai National Park, Alaska, you can vote on which bear got the fattest over the year. Bear 409 and Bear 701, they've been enjoying an annual salmon feeding frenzy. The vote closes tonight at 7 p.m. Eastern, Martha MacCallum will have them, both bears on "The Story."

GUTFELD: This is a fat shaming story. You're fat shaming.

PERINO: No, I'm not, the bears are supposed to get fat. And this is good.  You can go online. It's a kind of fun thing to do with the family. You can find out what they're weigh-in is at Facebook.com/KatmaiNPP.

GUTFELD: Propagating eating disorders among bears. Great, Dana.

PERINO: Yes, well, that's what I'm here for. Jesse.

WATTERS: I woke up this morning. I didn't think this was going to happen, but I'm going to defend Bill de Blasio.

GUTFELD: Oh, no!

WATTERS: Bill de Blasio was just working out at the gym, trying to do his thing, and a homeless activist confronted him at the gym. Watch.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

BILL DE BLASIO, NEW YORK CITY MAYOR: I'm just trying to work out. Sorry.  I can't do this now.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: In your affordable housing program, only 5 percent will go to the homeless.

DE BLASIO: I'm in the middle of a workout.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Why won't you commit more housing for homeless in New York, Mayor de Blasio?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WATTERS: You've got to be consistent, you know. You shouldn't be going after the guy at the gym. He obviously needs to be at the gym. Just look at him. He's doing the right thing. Get him on the street, get him where you can, not at the gym.

PERINO: The gym is sacred.

WILLIAMS: Absolutely. Dana and I have the same word.

PERINO: Juan.

WILLIAMS: Before I begin my "One More Thing," I wanted to do a shout-out to my wife. She had to have emergency surgery last week, an appendectomy.  From all your fans here at "The Five," kid, we're rooting for you. Get well soon.

GUTFELD: Did she get any meds?

WILLIAMS: Yes, she did, Gregory.

GUTFELD: You know what to do.

WILLIAMS: All right. All right. Now for my "One More Thing." And this is my pain. Last night on Monday Night Football, the New Orleans Saints thrashed the Washington football team. But there was some good news.  Saints quarterback Drew Brees broke the NFL record for most passing yards, He passed Peyton manning. He's on pace to break Manning's record for all- time touchdown passes, as well. So how did Peyton Manning react? Let's go to the videotape.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

PEYTON MANNING, FORMER QUARTERBACK: Let this serve as a congratulations for the touchdown record, because as you can see, I'm very busy. I don't have time to keep doing these videos for you congratulating you. But in all seriousness, Drew, congratulations on this record.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

WILLIAMS: Well, guess what? Drew Brees is nowhere near retirement, so I think we're all watching a hall of fame career. Go, Drew.

PERINO: I do want to raise a protest. I -- this is the "One More Thing" I wanted to do for "Dana's Sports Corner," and they said somebody else had taken it.

WILLIAMS: Yes.

PERINO: It was you. I had to do the fat bears.

WATTERS: It's called an interception, Dana.

PERINO: An interception. What does that mean?

I know what that one is. Greg.

GUTFELD: Speaking of, let's go to this this.

PERINO: Oh, wow.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

GRAPHIC: Greg's Sports Corner

GUTFELD: "Greg's Sports Corner."

(END VIDEO CLIP)

PERINO: My favorite.

GUTFELD: Whenever you watch soccer, those athletes often will fake an injury --

WATTERS: Oh, he's going to be angry.

GUTFELD: -- to slow down the game. They hurt their ankle. They're crying.

Now they have a new way to create delays in the games. Watch this. A dog gets loose on the field. But this is what's interesting about the dog.  It's trained to do a number of things. So this slows the game down and then dog -- get this -- look what this dog does. It gets on its side, roll over, there you go. And then asks to be petted on its belly. And then they have to do that. And while they're doing this, the other soccer players are getting water and sliced oranges, which is a complete outrage.

PERINO: That poor dog.

GUTFELD: Yes. They never saw him again.

Actually, the dog is doing fine and playing fullback for Arsenal.

WATTERS: All right. Go, Arsenal.

PERINO: Kennedy.

KENNEDY: All right.  The Rock 'N' Roll Hall of Fame nominations are out for the 2019 class. We don't know who's going to be in the class --

GUTFELD: No Monkees.

KENNEDY: But Janet Jackson has received her third nomination. Def Leppard, pour some sugar on that first nomination. Stevie Nicks with her first solo nomination.

PERINO: First?

KENNEDY: For solo.

PERINO: Wow.

KENNEDY: She got Fleetwood Mac. And my nemesis, Thom Yorke and Radiohead.  May they never be inducted into the great Rock 'N' Roll Hall of Fame.

GUTFELD: Boo!

KENNEDY: Boo you, Thom. Thom Yorke, thumbs down!

GUTFELD: You also hate Radiohead, too?

KENNEDY: I don't like Thom Yorke. Still. And it's been 25 years, buddy.

GUTFELD: What did he do?

KENNEDY: He's a creep.

GUTFELD: What did he do to you?

KENNEDY: It's a long story.

GUTFELD: I need to know this, because I can't stand him.

KENNEDY: He almost electrocuted himself to get back at me.

PERINO: Wow.

GUTFELD: We need --

PERINO: We will find out after this show.

GUTFELD: -- a whole hour on this show.

PERINO: Set your DVRs. Never miss an episode of "The Five." "Special Report" with Bret is up next.

BRET BAIER, FOX NEWS: I want to find out what happened with Radiohead and Kennedy.

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Outrage Over Children’s Book Parody Will Simply Feed Culture War Further

Source:Fox News

Outrage Over Children’s Book Parody Will Simply Feed Culture War Further

Outrage Over Children’s Book Parody Will Simply Feed Culture War Further

Source:Time

Outrage Over Children’s Book Parody Will Simply Feed Culture War Further